it's too hot outside to masturbate.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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