i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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