how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Randomize
