There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Come share oat with me in your robe
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
