just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
