all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
