Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
