No, you can still breathe under the balls.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
