Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
