And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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