I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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