You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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