He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize