when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
