is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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