their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
