porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
