just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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