i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize