so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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