I don't usually arrange sex via text message
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
