two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize