i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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