when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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