I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
two words...techno handjob
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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