Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
You have to summon your inner elephant
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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