Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
