On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
