so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
