The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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