So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I need water and some morals
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
