come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize