so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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