i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Randomize
