playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize