I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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