And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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