So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
