**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
