ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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