Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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