so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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