Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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