We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
