He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Randomize
