so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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