He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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