We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize