it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize