I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
